I suppose...

I suppose most of you out there think I have gone off the deep end with my Gnostic postings and such, but truthfully this has been the most healing and has made the most sense to me then anything I was ever taught in mainline Christanity.

Jesus teachings have become more real to me and even his purpose.

I was always confused by all the contradictions in the bible, especially the bi-polar personality of The Creator. I could never justify blood sacrifice on any level either. Maybe it is because of my background, however why would any loving Creator need a blood sacrifice to absolve sin? Jesus said all you had to do was ask forgiveness and go sin no more...I never read about him demanding a blood sacrifice to cover sins. In any case if anyone has ever been through the horrible ritual of a human or even an animal sacrifice, I can promise you, you would not understand blood sacrifices on any level!!!

So have I lost my salvation because I do not believe Jesus had to die to absolve our sins? I do believe he died because he was trying to set people free from religious programming, then somehow his death got turned into another horrible religion. 

Oh well, that is just my thoughts...I need a God who is not into blood, destruction, and eternal damnation. I need a God who is into love, forgiveness and hope.

Maybe I am naive, or maybe I am just tired of all the fighting, dissension, judging, unforgiveness, blood shed and being scared of a Creator's horrible wrath and destruction.

Reading the bible as an allegory has made it more real and  beautiful then I ever thought possible. I am totally relearning what the bible is about. I am totally relearning what my Creator and my life is about. For the first time in my life I am beginning to feel real peace and hope in my soul for all humankind. I am starting to see a beautiful laid out tapestry of life designed my a wonderful, loving Creator whom we are all an aspect of. It is our choice to follow the Kingdom within or follow the flesh without. Its a battle to be sure and we are all on different roads, however I am beginning to understand that that narrow road leads within.

This is my journey...I hope that even you all who do not agree with me can still love me and be my friend. I am not trying to convert anyone, however, I have to be true to who I am and to my Creator as I understand. I am tired of pretending...

Love and Prayers,
Judy